Waiting and waiting.....

So I made an appointment with my Hippopotamus back on the day I found out about this new wrinkle in my life. Dr. Hippo must be a popular doctor as my first chance to see him was February 12. So now I'm just waiting and possibly enjoying the time between now and then not having any of the side effects that may come with interferon therapy (should I have to have it) But the waiting is killing me. Not really killing me, but just having it linger out there is annoying.

What you may not know is that before I was in the convention & event business I was in health care. If you've been to the Emergency Room and the nurse tells you that this won't hurt much... then you feel the blinding pain flash while you're being held down... that was me :) Well, I was more honest than that actually. I would tell you it was going to hurt like a mother, but if you move or jerk it's going to hurt that much worse so hold still dammit!

Anyway, sometimes too much medical knowledge is a burden. You know what the worst could be so you sit around imagining the worst case in your health care. At a time when I'm trying to find the next long term job in my life, I keep worrying about how I'm going to be able to continue working while possibly feeling all these crappy side effects that could come. It is also a little disappointing (hell, a LOT disappointing) that I could miss my birthday again this year. Last year I turned 40 and had always planned for a big shin dig to kick off my 40's. My mom passed away in October of 2005 after a long battle with cancer which had me traveling back and forth to South Carolina in her final months. (something I would do all over again... in fact, had I known it was coming like that I would have moved home for the last part of her life) When my birthday rolled around I was broke and had no vacation time left to take any time off. So I sat back and started planning for my 41st birthday and planned on calling it My Big Birthday, 40 version 2.0 :) I have a feeling I'm going to turn 41 feeling like complete crap.

BUT... have to keep positive about it and hope for the best. In Mrs. Doubtfire Robin Williams' character says "Do you ever freeze one frame of your day and say 'This is not my life'?" I do, but alas, it still is my life. I've had plenty of good and I've had plenty of bad. I guess it's time for a little ugly... Bring it on baby!